Raijin ate my eyes

Raijin now weighs 16.5 pounds and is eating about 1 ½ to 2 cups of food a day. If he keeps this up, he should weigh about 45-50 pounds when he’s full grown. He loves to chew on his toy squirrels, his blue owl, his tug-o-war rope, Eva’s office chair, my office chair, the paint on the wall, the metal zipper on his travel kennel, even on the metal knobs of drawers. When I got Raijin, he weighed about 13.5 pounds, which means he’s grown 1 pound a week. Back then, he didn’t chew on much at all. But last night, while I was dreaming sweet nothingness, he decided it was time to chew on something new.

Raijin sleeps on the floor on a Lacoste bath mat which attempted to murder me one morning when emerging from the shower. After that incident, I retired the brand-new bath mat and banished it to the linen closet. Fear not, since Raijin’s center of gravity is much lower to the ground, it poses much less of a threat to him. So, where was I? Ah, right! I was dreaming sweet nothingness when I woke up at 6:30 AM, much like every morning, to let Raijin go out for a while. On the ground something familiar caught my eyes. Mind you, I’m not blind without the glasses that I wear so I can make out things easily. This, however, surprised me. My glasses which I left on my nightstand high above the ground were now beneath me and at Raijin’s paws.

I love you but leave my eyes alone you jerk